Assalamualaikum ~
So it has been a few days now that I've been thinking of the niqab issue in my head. Alhamdulillah with the help of two of my gorgeous ladies (tini & adilah).
I have this 50/50 thinking to wear them or not since my first intention to wear them was because to my eyes niqab is pure and beautiful. Wallahi I can't take my eyes off niqabis. I can stare at them the whole time when they're in front of me! Hahah. Ok it's sound weird , i know . But this was the past where i rarely see niqabis ard in Singapore . So when I do, I become like one 'Jakon' kid . Hahha!
But now ! My closest sisters are niqabis ! Masya'Allah! Heeh. I use to stare and wonder how they look like . But fret not i don't need to now. Hahah.
Ok that's not the issue I wanna share. The issue was abt these butterfly/3 layer niqab. I had this theory in my head that I'll look pretty in those . That was the main purpose why I wanted to wear niqab. But when I come to think again. Subhanallah that's not doing it for the sake of Allah! My intention went wrong the moment I thought abt that! So I consulted the sisters .
(Alhamdulillah I got a green light from my family and fiancé to wear them^^)
Adilah share me this;
'It does not comes down to which country we live in or whatever. It's all in the intentions kan kan kan?
Honestly for me, i prefer wearing the niqab because even despite wear tudong labuh and jubah, i still have the urge to put make up on. That's one of the main reasons why I'd prefer wearing niqab. :)
I'll be like "Okay.. Maybe a little powder.."
"Ok I'm too plain.. A little eyeliner maybe?"
"Okay, some blusher would be nice.."
Hahaha!'
It makes sense right. Though I don't wear makeup, I tend to smile alot especially with strangers. I don't know why but ya I'm just too friendly I guess. And that can cause trouble to my future husband. Hahah. I LOVE TO SMILE! (This was one of the reasons too that adilah wanted to talk to me during madrasah days cos I smiled at her.heheheh)
My smile is a killer I think. People melt when they see my smile. Hahah. This is cannot I tell you. I need to change my intention for wearing the niqab. And now alhamdulillah I do have a reason why.
Tini told me this(she's so masya'Allah that if its not because of her, I won't have any motivation to study the deen, may Allah reward goodness in the hereafter)
'I believe that at the end of the day, it's really up to your intentions. And your intention right now is you think you will be lawa gitu kn in niqab? So you have to change your intentions lah. :) must tell yourself that you are wearing it because you want to please Allah. Because it is a more modest way of dressing and Allah loves that :)
definitely the niqab is better than no niqab. But ofcourse, doesnt mean that org yg wear niqab is all better than the one who doesn't wear lah :) so the arrogance part must also push away. Or not Allah will be angry, na'udhubillah min zalik...'
It struck me for a moment when I read this. Like really, I clearly need to know what and where my intention is leading me to. Nauzubillah min zaalik, if its a wrong purpose to wear. No one wants Allah to get angry at them.
Insya'allah after i got married (that's what my daddy say. Heheh) I'll start wearing the niqab as a full timer and insya'allah I'll keep myself istiqamah.
My night was spent with tini via whatsapp as I had quite a rough day yesterday. Only Allah knows why .
And I did tell her too how my imaan level dropped so much that I can't think of any knowledgable stuff in my head. Subhanallah ! It was so bad that I felt so so weak and coward to talk to other sisters.
After texting her, I got some boost of imaan and read the Quran. Heheh. Alhamdulillah ala kulli hal! I was so proud of myself. But i didn't get to do my istikharah....... It's been awhile i didn't perform that. I sort of miss it now.
Insya'allah ! Tonight ^^
That's abt it. And I love my sisters for the sake of Allah ! ❤
Till then , illaliqa'❤
